It’s OK To Complain In Food Joints!

When was the last time you complained in a restaurant? When was the last time you sent something back? How about the last time you wrote a review on a review site or social media? When did you do both?

I suppose the biggest question you should ask yourself is when was the last time you had an opportunity to complain but decided to just write a scathing review instead?

I’m gonna start this by saying that we need to reframe the word complaint - we are gonna start calling it feedback. Because ‘complaint’ give off an aggressive, over bearing feel. It makes people puff their chest out, it gets peoples backs up and can easily escalate a simple conversation to a slanging match that no-one wants. It can lead to unfair reviews/feedback for the food joint and can leave a sour taste in the customers mouth which means they might not come back - potentially missing out on a great meal just because of one off night. People make mistakes and restaurants have off days - outside of the very top awarded restaurants, that’s reality! It’s why those restaurants have those stars and rosettes on the front of the building! Giving feedback (not complaining) is a positive thing, you can offer feedback and still be kind, respectful and a decent human. In fact, you are likely doing the restaurant a favour. There isn’t a place out there that is trying to do a bad job. They all want to rectify mistakes and they want the customers to enjoy themselves - they can’t do that without feedback!

A couple of things that I can’t stand about the food industry are review sites and keyboard warriors. I’m seeing more and more food places send out statements and messages to customers. ‘Do you know how long and how hard we work?’ and ‘Have some patience and respect for our staff - they work really long hours and work really hard, they are allowed to make mistakes’ - that sort of thing. It’s no secret that people in hospitality work long, seriously tough and quite stressful hours - but it’s also important to remember that we aren’t the only people or industry that does that! These are the kind of statements restaurants are sending out to protect staff, largely from these keyboard warriors. But they can cause collateral damage and stop people giving feedback. They can easily create a ‘shut up, eat, pay, leave - we don’t really care what you think’ kind of vibe! Which soon snowballs into a system where restaurants aren’t given the opportunity to respond or react to mistakes. It just seems to fuel people into thinking that just because they eat Fish & Chips in an average pub every Friday that they have the knowledge, wit and turn of phrase of Grace Dent; when all they are really doing is adding to the misery of the already exhausted staff! A misery that could have so easily been relieved with the opportunity to rectify a mistake. My favourite part of it is that it even offers a platform for people to actually make up scenarios, totally fabricate situations and just send out bare faced lies - does any one even know the end goal here?

So long story short, if this is you - please try to remember you aren’t a professional food critic, shut your laptop, log out of your tripadvisor account and close your awful ‘food blog’ account on instagram - no-one cares!

I’m under no illusion that it takes a lot of courage to stand up and say that we aren’t happy with something; let alone a lingering thought that we are tipping some poor soul over the edge!

Anyone who’s done a day in the hospitality trade will tell you now bad it can be! We all have horror stories to tell. Days that are better off forgotten - or saved up to share when you have a pint with the team and you need some light relief. Let’s not forget the famous saying, ‘You’d cry if you didn’t laugh about it’ (not sure that’s the right phrasing, but you know what I’m on about, right?). What I would also like to say is that the industry is not a North Korean labour camp - we choose to work in it, just like any other industry. So you can’t complain about the long hours, hard work and maybe being undervalued with pay or rewards from the job etc etc - to quote Bruce Hornsby and His Range - ‘That’s Just The Way It Is!’ So if this is how you feel, maybe hospitality isn’t for you, I don’t know?! I just can’t really abide by the excuses and the whinging. It’s an industry built on a desire to exceed expectations and get the job done as well as you possibly can! An industry with an ever changing landscape and a million plates to spin all at the same time! People are also allowed to make mistakes and as a general rule, the longer and more stressful the hours/work the higher chance there is of mistakes - so lets get back to that point about being respectful, patient and understanding. Which is kind of summed up by just being that rare version of our species - a reasonable human being!

Regardless of industry, every business has to listen to feedback. If it doesn’t, then it will likely fail. If you don’t listen to your customers they simply won’t come back and you will be totally in the dark as to what went wrong. So the bottom line is, as a customer, if you want to offer feedback, you have to communicate with the business! It’s kind of as simple as that! But there are better and worse ways of doing just about anything in this world and the important word to bear in mind here is CONSTRUCTIVE.

I know what you’re thinking……‘oh, well that’s easy’……yeah, simple…….until you are faced with a plate of food that is well below expectation or value for money and you get that sinking feeling that you have to send something back, so you decide against talking to the front of house staff, who had kindly come over and asked if everything was ok. Instead you kind of nod without making eye contact, then get your head down, move a bit of food around the plate to make it look like you’ve eaten, get the plate cleared, look up and say ‘Yes, thanks. That was lovely’……..knowing deep down you weren't happy; but that’s ok, because you have already started piecing together a scathing review in your head. A piece of writing so perfect that you feel like you are going to burst if you can’t get home quick enough to post it on social media or one of those god awful review sites. Suddenly you seem to be generating what you think is hilarious quip after hilarious quip, the odd bit of sarcasm thrown in for good measure. Sometimes even fabricating a scenario almost unbelievable to help give your story some clout and really get people sucked into your sad little life. Waiting for that moment when you’re sat on the loo with indigestion from the takeaway you scoffed on the way home when you can finally unleash this work of art into the world, before lying in bed waiting for the likes and comments of support for come flooding in! It’s a long wait……..

Or what you could do is put your grown up pants on and when the staff come over to check on you, you could say ‘Actually, sorry, it isn’t quite right……..(fill in the blanks from here)’ - and believe it or not, the response from the point will let you know exactly what kind of a establishment you are working with. Any decent place, with decent people trying their hardest to please their lovely customers will listen to you, apologise and then go and get the food remade for you. 9 times out of 10 it should be re-made. Not just re-plated onto a warm plate. Or kept warm while they cook you another piece of overcooked steak - so now you have sad, sweaty, cardboard chips with lovely cooked steak - great stuff! It’s easier just to remake the whole thing. The important thing is to be open, not to be aggressive and be willing to talk about it. It’s also important to do it before you’ve scoffed 3/4 of it. It really doesn’t help your case when a server is faced with an almost cleared plate and some negative feedback - really makes you look like a right wally. And believe me, you are the person the entire team laughs at down the pub after work! You might not be right, that might be how it is supposed to be, but that’s ok. That just means it isn’t to your taste. The staff will likely apologise and offer you something else on the menu. The point is, this is about everyone winning - working to find a way to please you, as the customer. The only way the restaurant can even attempt to make you happy is if you talk to the staff and get it rectified. It’s a two way street and any decent member of staff or customer should treat it that way. If you can’t reach an agreement then maybe you just need to look at the problem - it’s either you or the restaurant! But have a really hard look at yourself, it could well be you thats the problem! Ive seen it a million times, some people are impossible to please and seem hell bent on causing a fuss. But that’s ok - because at least you are sorting it face to face and not behind each others backs! Regardless of the outcome here - as a customer, your biggest weapon is simply not coming back. It’s not getting on line and firing out terrible reviews on every possible platform, it’s not getting so angry that you instantly start thinking of slogans and chants, texting your friends to get them enrolled to host a full placard filled protest right out side the restaurant. Just simply don’t come back!

To some of us, giving this kind of feedback face to face is easy. Maybe too easy for some. I definitely have some friends who seem to thrive on it. But for lots of us it feels like a mountain to climb and there are loads of considerations. Maybe you are under time pressure, it might be that you are trying to impress someone and you don’t want to be ‘that’ person yet. Or maybe you worry it will tarnish your night out - a moment you would rather achieve later in the night when you are face down in 4 litres of cheeky vimto while your mate’s sick in a bin.

So there is another way to go about it. What you could do is simply tell the staff it was fine, be polite, be pleasant and most importantly pay. You could then send them a private message or email and simply say that you just wanted to give them some feedback - remember, if you wanted money off or a free meal, you missed that chance by not telling them on the night so don’t go searching for discounts, invitations to dine again or anything in return. Just send some feedback - you can very quickly judge a place by how they respond to you in this way. Most places will love that you have taken the time to let them know, they will take it on the chin and they will act on it. As a result, their business will improve. There is also a good chance that they will invite you back to show you it was just an off night.

Dont forget - the staff work long hours, they are tired, they are at breaking point and so they may make a mistake. They might have just had an off night. Don’t judge a restaurant by whether they make a mistake - judge them on how they rectify it and deal with it. The only way to do that is to communicate with them. Directly or indirectly, it doesn’t matter, just be open to a conversation, be polite and be kind when you do it! Remember you are talking to other human beings! It’s about respect and allowing the restaurant to correct their mistake.

Regardless of the outcomes of however you approach your feedback, try not to resort to online reviews. If you feel like you have to, try not to be harsh and unfair - you’ll look like a right pillock when the restaurant replies and says ‘Im sorry you didn’t say anything at the time’. You definitely shouldn’t start making stuff up just generally being a whazzock! If you are so put out and totally unhappy and nothing else can be done, just don’t go back! That will be more effective than the tears you will cause the hard working staff - because in every team, good or bad there will always be at least one person busting their guts trying to do a good job!

Remember, it’s ok to complain! Just do it in the right ways!